Did You Ever
Wonder....
Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside
of the bottle?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is a boxing ring square?
Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?
Why is it considered necessary
to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
Why is it that to stop Windows 95, you have to
click on "Start"?
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address,
you
turn down the volume on the radio?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor,
and
dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush
hour?
Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
Why
isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
How come we drive
on parkways and park on driveways?
How come sheep don't shrink when it rains but a
wool
sweater does when you wash it?
?
If a parsley farmer
is sued, can they garnish his wages?
Would a fly without
wings be called a walk?
Why bills travel through
the mail at twice the speed of checks?
Why don't sheep shrink
when it rains?
Why are they called
apartments when they are all stuck together?
Can you be a closet
claustrophobic?
Why the sun lightens
our hair, but darkens our skin?
If the funeral procession
is at night, do you drive with your lights off?
If a stealth bomber
crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?
If cops arrest a mime,
do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
Why is the word abbreviation
so long?
Why women can't put
on mascara with their mouth closed?
If a book about failures
doesn't sell, is it a success?
Do cemetery workers
prefer the graveyard shift?
What do you do when
you discover an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?
Do hungry crows have
ravenous appetites?
Do Lipton Tea employees
take coffee breaks?
If Fed Ex and UPS
were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
If quitters never
win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, 'Quit while you're ahead?'
Is it possible to
be totally partial?
When companies ship
Styrofoam, what do they pack it in?
If it's tourist season,
why can't we shoot them?
Why is the time of
day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why do they sterilize
the needles for lethal injections?
What's another word
for thesaurus?
Why is it that doctors
call what they do "practice"?
Why is lemon juice
made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?
Why is there an expiration
date on sour cream?
Why do kamikaze pilots
wear helmets?
How do you know when
it's time to tune your bagpipes?
Is it true that cannibals
don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
When you choke a smurf,
what color does it turn?
You know that indestructible
black box that is used on airplanes?
Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?
Do radioactive cats
have 18 half-lives?
Why is the man who
invests all your money called a broker?
If you shoot a mime,
should you use a silencer?
What was the best
thing before sliced bread?
If flying is so safe,
why do they call the airport the terminal?
